I could do 12 days of Christmas in 12 hours.

Note: this post was originally started about a week ago.

Today was just all kinds of awesome.

 

The last couple of weeks have been insanely stressful.  Like heart-palpitations-every-time-I-do-something-as-strenuous-as-walking-to-my-car stressful.  I tried cutting caffeine entirely, and no improvement.  The only thing that helped was this week.  It’s the last week of classes, and I had a week built into my syllabus just in case we had a weather cancellation that would require making up a lab.  That means all I have this week are lectures, office hours, and catching up with grading.  And today, I actually have…<drumroll>…A DAY OFF.

 

Not only do I have a day with no classes, I got my lecture notes fully prepped for Thursday on Tuesday morning, so I can truly take the day off.  SO I DID.  Sure, I have lab reports and quizzes to grade, and a big game-show-style review to prepare for Friday’s last lecture, and a quiz to write, but dammit, I am doing NONE of that today.

 

Today, I shop.

Correction: Today, I drive an hour to find places in which to shop.  I did most of my Christmas shopping online last night, but there are some things that simply must be done in-person.  It began with an eye appointment.  I have not had one of those in nearly 6 years.  I have been wearing the same 2-for-$99 glasses for SIX YEARS.  While I can tell my prescription hasn’t changed much at all in that time, my sense of style certainly has, and my optical coverage DEFINITELY has.  Of course, that is also enough time for me to have forgotten how agonizing this process can be – nothing emphasizes the asymmetry of your face quite like applying stage makeup or shopping for glasses.  And I tried on absolutely every pair in LensCrafters and could not find a damn thing I liked.  SO discouraging.  Luckily, this mall also has a JCPenney optical and Sears optical, where the glasses are cheaper and…well…less stylish.  But seeing as how the current trends in eyewear are all tiny, rectangular things that look absolutely ridiculous on my incredibly large head, I’m okay with being out of fashion.  At Sears, my final stop, I found not one but TWO pairs of frames I actually liked, both of which were on clearance which means I didn’t even spend enough to use up the allowance on my optical plan.  WIN.

On my way out of the mall, $7 boots.  WIN.

Still getting over a sinus infection, so hit the appropriate part of town to get Asian groceries and a bowl of pho.  WIN.  On my way there, passed a World Market.  Found an absolutely perfect and very reasonably priced little wine bar that will most likely be lovely in my apartment.  Also picked up a couple of clearance wines and some spices I needed for Christmas present projects.  DOUBLE WIN.

Stopped at health food store to get essential ingredient for homemade cocktail bitters, which are going to be made into Christmas presents for Dad.  WIN.

Stopped at fancy cigar shop to get some good tobacco for a culinary experiment.  Very helpful salesdude had no idea why I wanted to make tobacco-flavored cocktails, but allowed me to sniff my way through the pipe tobacco jars until I was satisfied.  WIN.  (Also, got to this part of town 10 minutes after the meters became free.  WIN.)

Made my way home, and stopped for remaining project ingredients.  This involved a stop at the party store for a bottle of rye and a cigar.  As I pondered the stock and made my choice, another (perhaps chemically enhanced) customer at the register said something along the lines of, “firing up a cigar tonight, huh?  nice…” to which I replied, “not exactly.”  He responded with a nod of understanding, a chuckle, and an, “I gotcha…”

I can probably guess what he thought I was doing tonight, but I’m quite certain his thought process WASN’T, “duuuuude…she is totally going to make bitters out of that.”

 

I finally arrived at home, and started putting up all of my Christmas decorations, including my Tiny Tree:

Awww…isn’t it cute?

 

In short…I found my Christmas spirit. 

You know what else I found?  The fine print in the Target commercials.  I have been DYING to track down the music they’re using this year, but since I generally watch TV as background noise with my laptop or a stack of papers in my lap, I have never noticed the button at the end that tells you that you can download the music FOR FREE from their website.  Seriously, go.  Get it.  Best Christmas album I’ve found in AGES.  It’s hard to find such a good blend of miraculously non-cheesy and delightfully over-cheesed-in-a-good-way holiday music.  I particularly love the Toy Jackpot commercial (WHY OH WHY ISN’T THERE MORE GOOD CHRISTMAS HIPHOP???), but as a single girl living alone, Tiny Tree Christmas is kind of my theme song.

What?  My dad once found his Christmas spirit via an impulse purchase of “A Polka Christmas.”  I shit you not.

 

And now, a week after I started writing this post, I have given my final exam and am now unofficially on Winter Break, and those online presents have started to roll in:

Look!  Tiny Santa has come and left Tiny Presents!

 

So at this point, my bitters are brewing, my present-making supplies are en route, the ice has finally all been chipped off of my car, and perhaps most importantly, all of my brick-and-mortar shopping is DONE.  I even had to go back to Grand Rapids to go to a MALL… on a SATURDAY…and managed to keep my spirits up.  There are cookies in the dining room, egg nog in the fridge, and the new bar is well-stocked.  So when are you coming over?